The year 2013 is a book and January 1 is the first page.
I heard that in church on Sunday, on Facebook, and on Twitter. So, here’s what my first page would say:
Once upon a time, there was a girl named Amy. She had the day off work and slept much longer than she normally would. After she stumbled out of bed and made a pot of coffee, she made a delicious batch of french toast. For the next 4 hours she mostly stared at her laptop, occasionally pausing to clean a bit of her house (So that the day would feel productive). After taking a shower, she ate some more french toast. She then dressed and went to see the final Twilight movie. During this movie, she covered her eyes a few times, drove home, and ate more french toast.
After only speaking four words out loud to another human (One for Twilight, please.) she was in bed by 9PM.